This is the blog of Justin Michael Terwilliger. This is the page where I share my inner most thoughts and feelings. I open up in every way that I can put into words. Words are hard to express at times and it's not always easy to express yourself, but as you can see I certainly try to. Please read avidly and criticize all you wish. These are my thoughts, nobody is to say they are wrong. This is my only blog on Tumblr. For my actual Tumblr profile, go to http://www.justinselsewhere.tumblr.com


All posts here, are my own creations and imaginings unless stated otherwise.
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justinselsewhere:

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Sunday night, October 20th, 2011; 11:00 pm, Joey took his girlfriend Sarah out on a date. The date consisted of dinner and a movie, and then a drive down to the creek for typical teenage behavior.

The road was darker than usual on this night. Sarah commented on the moon barely shining through the thick woods that surrounded Fox Lake. Joey said that it was just dark because it was late, and she had nothing to worry about. Sarah still felt uneasy, thinking of the legend that surrounded the town teenagers favorite make out point made her that way.

The point was actually beautiful. It sat high on a hill, overlooking Fox Lake. On the right nights when the moon was full and hung high in the sky like a giant florescent light, the moonlight reflected off of the water and back into the cars. On those nights, you didn’t even need a light on to see your lovers face.

But the beautiful sight of the point came with a dark history. One that led police on a manhunt decades earlier. Since then, Fox Lake PD had tried to lock down the main road that led to the lake, but teenagers always found their way in since the lake had many roads of entry. A lot of teenagers went in for a night of uninterrupted passion, and some never came back out. Since Fox Lake was a small town with a population of a little over 1,000 police and students could always spot when someone went missing.

The point was said to be haunted by a man. This man is said to wear a red sack on his head, is around 7’0 feet tall, had long, sharp eagle claw like fingernails, and his tongue had been cut out. The sack on his head was to cover his deformed face and hide his mouth bleeding profusely onto the sack, dying it a deep dark red. The weapon used to kill the victims? An ax. Not a small ax, a large one, which would normally take two hands for a normal man to swing, but for the man, it was like swinging a short hatchet. ”The Ax Man” they called him.

Whoever saw the Ax Man, wound up being cut into pieces, and were usually found without arms and legs, gutted like you would gut a fish, and hung by their intestines from the tallest oak tree that overlooked Fox Lake. The police had found several teenagers over the years without arms or legs, completely gutted, and hanging on old oak, painting the lake red with their blood until they ran dry. Their cars were always found smashed on the point, and abandoned. Each crime scene brought a question, one that authorities have never been able to answer, what happened to the other teen that went that night? The second always came up missing, and were never found.

The legends and stories are passed down by teenagers and parents in Fox Lake, to warn others not to go and see the beauty while the moon shines. The legend passed down through generations of kids, and with ever generation, the legend grew stronger, and spread more fear. Some are brave enough to go anyway, because Fox Lake is most beautiful and romantic at night, and most of the time they come back just fine. The girls tell their friends of the night they had with their significant other, the boys tell their friends that it wasn’t scary and they passed the Ax Man test. But some aren’t so lucky.

The legend grows, and with each generation the mysterious Ax Man becomes more mysterious and dark. There are different versions of the story through each generation, and friends often find themselves arguing over which version of the story is the right version. Some say the Ax Man doesn’t speak, while others say he lets out a low moan, trying to speak but only spits up blood and bile. Some say he lands on top of the car without a warning, while other say he scratches the trees behind the cars and wants to chase his victims.

The whereabouts of the Ax Man were unknown and nobody has ever seen him alive and lived to tell of it. Some say he’s a demon and dissects his victims because he was murdered by mutilation, having his limbs cut off, tongue cut out, and hung from the oak when it was significantly shorter. Some say he drags the second victim to Hell to be tortured with him, while most say the legend is nothing more than a load of bullshit and kids run off together. Still, the unexplained deaths, the lines deeply carved into the trees, the echoing screams heard some nights, and the unexplained disappearances of some teenagers raises the question, is the Ax Man real? There is too much evidence to say yes. 

“Sarah!” Joey yells. Sarah hadn’t even noticed he was talking. She just sat there, stuck in a trance, thinking of the Ax Man. Joey grabs her by the shoulders and shakes her “Sarah! What’s going on? Sarah, look at me!” Sarah stares into his eyes and tells him “I’m sorry. I know that tonight is supposed to be as beautiful as the point is, but Michelle told me the story today in school when I told her we were planning to take the trip out here, and I guess I just got all shook up. You know it’s my first time here, and I guess I have the man stuck in my mind.” Joey tells her that nothing will happen to her, and he’s there to protect her. It takes her mind off of the man and they start to fade into each other and become passionate. 

Afterwards, they sit in the car to talk. The conversation was great. Sarah and Joey had been together for over a year and a half, and they still made each other laugh and smile every time they saw each other. Most people said they were the perfect couple. They were always happy.

They talk for hours, and around 2:00 am the wind starts to blow, the moon starts to shine a little brighter, coming out from behind the few clouds that were in the sky. They’re still laughing and talking when Sarah stops the conversation and the laughter, and tells Joey to shush, and says she heard something coming from the woods. “Shhhhhh! Didn’t you hear that?!” Joey laughs, and says “Man, that story really got to you. It’s just a story, Sarah. The man isn’t real. Everything is fine.” And he goes back to what he was talking about. Sarah isn’t so sure. She interrupts Joey in the middle of his sentence and asks if they can leave. Joey becomes a little irritated but decides to go by her wishes, and starting the car.

*CRACK* *SNAP* Sounds coming from behind the car. *THRASH* *SCRATCH* *SCRATCH* *SCRATCH*

“Shhhhhhh! Turn the engine off.” Joey heard it that time. He turns off the engine while grabbing a knife from the glove box. “Someone’s out there messing with us, babe. It’s nothing, but if they try to come in here I’m going to kill them.” Sarah becomes frantic, starts breathing heavily and feels her heart beating through her chest. The moon seems to go away, swallowed by the woods and the clouds.

*CRACK* *SNAP* *SCRAPE* *SCRATCH*

“Don’t say…a word” whispers Sarah. They are both too petrified to move, goosebumps form all over their bodies, and the hair on Joeys arms and on the back of Sarahs neck start to stick up as they hear a shallow moan, like someone with a towel stuffed in their mouth is trying to speak. Then the nightmare starts.

The car starts to move and shake back and forth like something is crawling on the roof. *BAM* a thud hits the roof. *BAM* a thud hits the driver side door. *SMASH* The back windshield breaks and shards of glass fly into the car, cutting Sarah’s face and imbedding into Joey’s head. Then they hear a sound that puts them both into shock, the sound that terrifies Sarah and petrifies Joey. *SCRATCH* Metal, scraping both sides of the car at the same time. Long, jagged screeches that sound like the screams of someone being tortured. Worse than any nails scraping on a chalk board.

Sarah manages to move her eyes to her window, to see a shadow standing there. She tried to let out a scream but only a squeak comes out. Her eyes swell with tears and the long fingers scratch the window, the claws scraping and cutting into the glass. Blood running off the arms, stitches running up the body, pale skin cutting the darkness like a white paint to black paper.

*SMASH* The window breaks into the car, into Sarah’s eyes, and finally she’s able to let out a blood curling scream.

Joey was found the next morning, hanging from the oak, amputated arms and legs, gutted, hanged with his own intestines. His intestines were around his throat so tight his entire face was black and blue. Blood dripping into the Fox, painting it red like a new canvas of art, mixing with the deep blue water.

The car was found smashed, long cuts down both sides, windowless, bloody, teeth wrapped around the steering wheel, and a single bloody jacket in the passenger seat.

Sarah has never been found. There are no leads to her whereabouts. It’s been 3 years. But some nights you can hear screaming from the point. Screaming that sends shivers down your spine, and causes your hair to stand up. Screaming of a tortured soul, being burned alive.

It’s never been proven that it’s Sarah screaming. Some say she went crazy and killed Joey, then vanished. But some say it was the Ax Man of Fox Lake. Their friends and family don’t know what to think, and don’t ever talk about it, but in the back of their minds they always have known that it was the Ax Man of Fox Lake that took her.

Posted on June 29th, 2014 at 3:19 AM
This post has 7 notes
Tags ~ sixpenceee ~ The Point ~ Make your own urban legend ~ The Ax Man of Fox Lake ~ Ax Man ~ JustinsElsewhere
Source: justinselsewhere

So i’ve been doing some research on things that will help me get really healthy, and hep me motivate myself to work out again, get into better shape and help with swimming that i’m going to be doing, and through this research i’ve come across some really interesting things, and if you want to read through this, I hop it will help you, like it will help me.

Most people tell themselves that they’re going to get healthy and start eating better and get back to the gym but then they don’t. I’m definitely guilty of this. I think most of us are. But here are some things that can help you feel good, get motivated, and heal your Pineal gland. 

Pineal gland is really important, and I just tarted doing more research about it, mainly because I am trying to be a psychology major, and learn more about the brain, but also because there is a belief that the Pineal gland is responsible for psychic energy, the link between body and soul, and the human link to the other dimensions and worlds. If you belief in these things, like I do, then you want to make sure that your Pineal gland is strong and declassified. As we grow older we use our Pineal gland less, and it eventually is almost non existent and may as well not even be there. This is really sad. 

So onto healthy eating. It is just as important as exercise is. You can exercise all day, but if you’re putting toxins in your body like fast food(which is all toxins) then you’re not going to make any progress. The best things you can put in your body are natural foods, and I know what you’re going to say: “We know that fruits and vegetables are the best thing to eat already.” but what about herbs? If you have a healthy diet consisting of healthy herbs then your Pineal gland and your body are going to be rejuvenated. 

Here is a list of healthy herbs and food that you can eat that taste good and will make you healthier than you have ever been, and not only that, but will make you feel better than you ever have.

Chaga MushroomKing of the Mushrooms- The Chaga mushroom is composed of a dense configuration of antioxidant pigments, distinguishing it from other medicinal mushrooms. Like other superherbs, such as Astragalus membranaceus and Gynostemma pentaphyllum, chaga helps to reduce the workload of the immune system as a whole. Nearly every type of superherb has a different content of saponins and polysaccharides, with each combination helping to boost the activity of our immune cells in different ways—polysaccharide beta glucans molecules match up with a specific type of cell in the immune system, each promoting a different immune response.

Various substances found in chaga possess powerful anti-cancer and anti-tumour properties. Many of chaga’s anti-cancer properties are now being attributed to beta glucans and melanin, as well as to its other vitality- and longevity-inducing medicinal properties. Beta glucans are scientifically recognized as one of the richest, most important forms of healing polysaccharides. Their discovery in the mycelium (netted, brainlike fungal structure) and in the fruiting bodies of medicinal mushrooms has provided insight on the chemistry of how medicinal mushrooms work to heal the human body.

Read more at http://www.themindfulword.org/2012/chaga-medicinal-mushrooms/#I5OxL1pCFo7TUQK0.99

Raw Chocolate- Yes, chocolate can be very very healthy for you. These are just some of the benefits of raw Chocolate.

1) Raw chocolate can lower blood pressure & improve circulation

Flavanols, theobromine, and other components found in cacao may lower blood pressure and enhance circulation by promoting dilation, strength, and health of blood vessels

2) Raw chocolate can promote cardiovascular function & health

The antioxidant power of flavonoids and essential minerals and vitamins found in cacao can support healthy heart functioning5 by lowering blood pressure, improving blood flow, lowering LDL cholesterol, and reducing plaque buildup on artery walls.6

3) Raw chocolate Can Neutralize free radicals

High levels of antioxidants protect the body from a buildup of free radicals from sun exposure, pollution, cigarette smoking, etc., which may damage healthy body tissue giving rise to cancer and cardiovascular disease.

4) Raw Chocolate can improve digestion

A sufficient amount of fiber delivered with each serving of cacao supports digestion while cacao stimulates the body’s production of digestive enzymes.

5) Raw chocolate can enhance physical and mental well-being

There are many components of cacao including alkaloids, proteins, beta-carotene, leucine, linoleic, lipase, lysine, and theobromine, that all work together to improve physical and mental health.  For example, theombromine helps to stimulate the central nervous system, relax smooth muscles, and dilate blood vessels, giving the body a boost of energy;  “bliss” chemicals found in cacao help to increase circulation and availability of serotonin and other neurotransmitters in brain, improving mood and combating depression.

Those are the two I wanted to focus on, but there are of course many many other herbs. Go to the following websites to do more research. These websites are safe, and you can learn more at 

owenfox.org

http://www.higherselfherbs.com/

https://www.mountainroseherbs.com

http://owenfox.org/herb-recommendations.php

DON’T FORGET TO EXERCISE. These herbs and foods are going to help, but exercise is the main thing we all need.

These are good places to start. Good luck everyone. You want your mind and body to be sharp for anything that is to come in the future. Balance yourself out. I’m at the start of my journey, and I hope to share the rest with you all soon.

justinselsewhere:

This is my Great Grandfather. He died July 7th, 2012 from cancer. 
He was the kind of guy that would help guide me, take care of the family, his wife and everyone he loved, first thing, above all else, and definitely before himself. He was in the war so he could have been a bitter old man, like many vets seem to become in their old age, but every time I saw him, he had a smile on his face. He would give you the shirt off of his back in a blizzard and be completely happy knowing he made you a little warmer. 
He took care of my great grandmother when she was diagnosed with Alzheimers and dementia. Because of her medication she would need to get up to go to the bathroom literally every 5 to 10 minutes. While this can and does become frustrating to some, he never complained about it. He always got up and said “Let me help you, babe.” and walked her to the bathroom. 
Even when my great grandmother went to a nursing home, because he being over the age of 80 could not physically take care of her as much as he wanted to, he still went and saw her every day. Multiple times. Sometimes she didn’t remember him, but this didn’t matter to him much, he still remembered her, and boy did he love her. This went on for years.
July 4th, 2012 I got a call from my mother while preparing to go out with some friends. She told me my grandfather was in the hospital and she didn’t know what was going on. I went to the hospital and saw him lying in the bed. I cried because I had never seen the strongest man I had ever known, so weak. He didn’t even look like the same man. He just laid there, unconscious, and we didn’t know if he was ever going to wake up. The doctor came in and told us that he had had cancer for years and never said a word about it to anyone. He was too busy taking care of everyone else that he didn’t take care of himself. He was diagnosed with what the doctor referred to as a “severely aggressive lung cancer.”
The next day, before going to see him, I got his name tattooed on my ankle. When I showed up at the hospital, my aunt, my mother, and my grandmother burst into tears. My aunt said “I never knew how much he meant to Justin. I don’t even like tattoos and it’s beautiful. To know he had such an affect on him means the world to me.”
While this was happening, I went over to my great grandfather and held his hand, I kept silent because I didn’t know what to say. He opened his eyes a little bit, looked me right in the eye and tried to smile. He had a tube sticking down his throat so he could breathe, and he still managed to crack a smile. I told him that I loved him and he shed a few tears and fell back asleep. 
When I had to leave, I was saying goodbye to my family. After, I went and grabbed his hand and told him “I know things are really hard to understand right now, but I love you, and I’ll be back tomorrow.” I kissed him on the forehead and left. While I was leaving I looked to my brother and I said “This is going to be the very last time we see him. I hope you said what you had to say.” to which he replied “We’ll see him tomorrow, dude. Don’t worry.”
He passed away a few hours later.
I will never forget what my great grandfather taught me. He taught me to love everyone, take good care of your family, be a good person no matter what, and always try to find the good in everyone and everything. 
I will never forget you, Papa. I love you with all of my heart. I hope I showed you that when we watched all those baseball games, played catch, and sat around the table talking. I hope I showed you.

justinselsewhere:

This is my Great Grandfather. He died July 7th, 2012 from cancer. 

He was the kind of guy that would help guide me, take care of the family, his wife and everyone he loved, first thing, above all else, and definitely before himself. He was in the war so he could have been a bitter old man, like many vets seem to become in their old age, but every time I saw him, he had a smile on his face. He would give you the shirt off of his back in a blizzard and be completely happy knowing he made you a little warmer. 

He took care of my great grandmother when she was diagnosed with Alzheimers and dementia. Because of her medication she would need to get up to go to the bathroom literally every 5 to 10 minutes. While this can and does become frustrating to some, he never complained about it. He always got up and said “Let me help you, babe.” and walked her to the bathroom. 

Even when my great grandmother went to a nursing home, because he being over the age of 80 could not physically take care of her as much as he wanted to, he still went and saw her every day. Multiple times. Sometimes she didn’t remember him, but this didn’t matter to him much, he still remembered her, and boy did he love her. This went on for years.

July 4th, 2012 I got a call from my mother while preparing to go out with some friends. She told me my grandfather was in the hospital and she didn’t know what was going on. I went to the hospital and saw him lying in the bed. I cried because I had never seen the strongest man I had ever known, so weak. He didn’t even look like the same man. He just laid there, unconscious, and we didn’t know if he was ever going to wake up. The doctor came in and told us that he had had cancer for years and never said a word about it to anyone. He was too busy taking care of everyone else that he didn’t take care of himself. He was diagnosed with what the doctor referred to as a “severely aggressive lung cancer.”

The next day, before going to see him, I got his name tattooed on my ankle. When I showed up at the hospital, my aunt, my mother, and my grandmother burst into tears. My aunt said “I never knew how much he meant to Justin. I don’t even like tattoos and it’s beautiful. To know he had such an affect on him means the world to me.”

While this was happening, I went over to my great grandfather and held his hand, I kept silent because I didn’t know what to say. He opened his eyes a little bit, looked me right in the eye and tried to smile. He had a tube sticking down his throat so he could breathe, and he still managed to crack a smile. I told him that I loved him and he shed a few tears and fell back asleep. 

When I had to leave, I was saying goodbye to my family. After, I went and grabbed his hand and told him “I know things are really hard to understand right now, but I love you, and I’ll be back tomorrow.” I kissed him on the forehead and left. While I was leaving I looked to my brother and I said “This is going to be the very last time we see him. I hope you said what you had to say.” to which he replied “We’ll see him tomorrow, dude. Don’t worry.”

He passed away a few hours later.

I will never forget what my great grandfather taught me. He taught me to love everyone, take good care of your family, be a good person no matter what, and always try to find the good in everyone and everything. 

I will never forget you, Papa. I love you with all of my heart. I hope I showed you that when we watched all those baseball games, played catch, and sat around the table talking. I hope I showed you.

Posted on April 15th, 2014 at 4:30 AM
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Source: justinselsewhere
"Isn’t a person just a collection of their mistakes, and also their, kind of, undoing of their mistakes? I mean, what else are you? You know, you’re always just the reaction to the bad parts of yourself, I think. And I think that’s what is kind of like, a driving motivation behind any human being…who wants to continue to grow and live life. Because they’re looking at their flaws and trying to, go beyond it. And I think that a person, you know, essentially dies when they think that they found themselves, you know? Unless you want to admit that you, yourself, are not an individual, and are just part of a whole movement of ideas, and thought, and culture, and humanity and, furthermore, the universe, and everything. Unless you really feel like that, and you’re walking through walls, You know, you are always trying to find yourself. And it’s usually a person who believes that they’ve found “the answer”, found “the end” that there actually is a psychological end. And then what’s the point of doing anything after that? "
Eyedea
Posted on October 20th, 2013 at 5:31 PM

Reborn.

Reborn.

Posted on September 26th, 2013 at 3:28 AM
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You sit there, in your chair wondering how another day came. “Not tomorrow” you say as you put clothes on your naked flesh, preparing yourself for the day. A day that you wished never came.

You call for a cab to take you away. Take you to the one place that you feel safe and sane. To that little center of the world where you feel nothing can hurt you. To the place that you can think clearly, or not at all. Maybe you’ll think about the boy you loved, the one that died down the street the year before.

You hope for something better but then tell yourself “Nothing possibly can get better” and you just run away. You tell yourself that’s why you drink to excess and smoke a pack a day. No hope.

You try to make it better but then tell yourself it can’t get better and second guess every decision you try to make, and what is this life? Why are you feeling it? You’re your own worst enemy. The only one you can’t defeat.

Face your demons.

Posted on September 26th, 2013 at 1:47 AM
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Hi, my name is Justin. I’m a pretty insignificant being. I’m just a June bug. I live life freely and uncaring. I skitter until Zack Miller or Evan Martin sets me on fire. I fall into a pit of wax, or chocolate and just drown. I’ll drown there and my death is inevitable just like yours. But the thing about it was, it wasn’t a wasted life. It was a care free and simple oneThe simple beauty and love experienced was worth every breath lost in my inevitable end.

Posted on June 26th, 2012 at 3:36 AM
This post has 1 note
Tags ~ Me ~ Self ~ Poetry? ~ Poetry ~ Blog

Posted on June 8th, 2012 at 11:10 PM
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Source: justinselsewhere

The lonely sandy mountains were once friends with the deepest seas. Then in one swift night, God cast out his hand and took the oceans away from the mountains. Then the winds came down and blew the sands away. So the sands lost everything. The sands traveled on the wind and eventually set in the dryest desert on Earth. Forever to be scorched by the burning sun. Now I don’t know much about that, but I do know there was purpose and reason behind it. It all comes together in the end. It all comes together for that one perfect moment, suspended in time, as if nothing could touch it.

Posted on May 18th, 2012 at 4:01 PM
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Whoever is hacking into my tumblr and posting gay sex, please stop. I’m not a gay basher l, I don’t hate gay people and I don’t discriminate against someone for a choice that frankly had nothing to do with me. However this is starting to get old and upsetting. So please stop doing it. I work all day. I shouldn’t have to have to come home to deleting a bunch of shit.

Posted on May 14th, 2012 at 1:48 AM